Fast Forward

Hmm...What if you were so unlikeable that only your close friends were your friends. That would be intense. You wouldn't have any of those flaky friends. But, it's who you know, not what you know. You're hosed in that aspect of the world.

Friend circles are weird. You know that they are. But you can't just jump in. It would be like diving into a crowd, and they don't catch you. Awkward and stupid. You could try to work your way in I guess. That would take a long time. I might not have that long. Maybe I should just forget it. I should.

Living in fast forward. Zip zoom. No time for thoughts. Go go go. So much energy. Wee. I don't think I want to live in fast forward. I don't have real hobbies I guess. What do I do when I'm alone? Try to connect with other people through something. My attempts are futile though. In the time it's take to write this, two people came asking for my siblings. I might always have to be the one who makes stuff happen. Well, why don't you just not make stuff happen? They will miss you eventually. Nope. I tried. I end up staying at home. For a long time. How sad.

This is an emergency. There are tears from the saints for the lost and unsaved. We are crying for them come back home. All of your children will stretch out their hands and pick up the crippled man. Father we will lead them home.

Perspective is so amazing. Ours is messed up. We see what they want us to see, and do what they want us to do. It's worth it to get away. I'm just another pawn adding to the destruction. Reprioritize. Pawn forward.

Checkmate.

We need something new and different, where we can all start at the same level. All start fair. I didn't like the fair. It was sunny and crowded. And always with the family. Family outings don't jive well with me. They generally don't go well. I'd rather avoid them.

Go betweens. It isn't fun to be one. But it gives you something to do, I else. So much wasted time....

If you think about what could happen but probably won't, does that make you a visionary?