Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Football

I am writing this because I was told to. When I asked him what to write about, he told me it was my blog, so I could do what I wanted. I found that kind of funny, how he said I should write, but then told me it was my blog. He suggested I write about him. A story maybe? Well, there you are. There's your story. If I was a bad a jerk, then I would end it all here, and I would have written, like I told him I would, even about what he suggested, while still making my point. However, I think I have more to write about, so I will. And it would be kind of chintzy to say I was going to write something and do that. So there. Integrity.

And Purity. I watched a movie. I don't get to watch many movies here on my hill. It wasn't on my hill, it was in a theater, but that made it more special. When do I see movies in theaters anymore? The last one I saw was...in June maybe? September lates. Jordan invited me, which was cool. And there were actually a bunch of people going, which was a pleasant surprise. And, apparently Tuesday is special at that theater, so we got pop and popcorn for free with our tickets. Crazy. I was thinking 'I sure ain't getting any overpriced theater food', but it happened. So I turned down the popcorn and got a fruit beer. It has been a while for those too. Jordan got a water, but, oops, it's carbonated. Sort of funny. We watched Blindside. I decided it is about purity. To some degree anyway. Maybe I'm delusional. Whatevs. I laughed and I cried, it was beautiful. An experience to be had.

It made me miss my lady friend a bit. I guess it is about nine more days. Yes, there is a countdown. Is that bad? I missed her because I decided I want to experience life with her. Friends, you can ask a lot of them, but you can't ask them to give up life as they know it to come live a life with you. It shouldn't be expected, and it is sort of weird to ask. Weird doesn't stop people anymore. To know and be known, to experience everything in this world with someone, that is special. That is why I miss her. Sometimes I think it is because I am a stupid boy, but it is more than that. But, enough of this.

I have it in my head that people don't like it when someone speaks of their other. So, I try to avoid doing it too much. I learned stuff at Bible College. Honest. Even some stuff about God. He does not work anything like I thought he might. I don't know how I thought he worked before, and maybe I didn't. I just thought he was. But he gives us chance on chance. Knowing more makes reading the bible fuller. same with prayer. It's funny, not 'haha' funny but a 'whoop whoop' funny, how now that it is more, I still don't do either much. I could get into comparisons between a boy and a girl and how God loves us, but I said I wouldn't talk of that much. Also, I am more accountable now for what I know. God gives us things for us, but we are supposed to share it. It ain't only for us.

I grew up in the church, and I have (or had. Who knows anymore?) a decent memory, so I know most of the bible stories. I went to the things with the youth groups. I know the kind of thing that is spoken of. And how often different things are spoken of, so much so, that when a person doesn't know something I have known since childhood, it throws me off a bit. I know. How could I think everyone knows what I knew? But it was so common, I assumed. As such, I feel like anything I might have to share ain't useful because it has all been heard before. There is nothing new under the sun, right?

That's the craziest thing though. Despite nothing being new, every child born has to catch up from the beginning. It is all new. Mark says that if a generation learned from history, well, we have never had that before. An entire generation not making the same mistakes as their fathers? What would happen? Israel, time and again were shown God's standard. Do this and I will make you plentiful. Do something else, reject me, I'll reject you, and you will be left to the world. Judges, over and over again. Kings, over and over again. What if...?

Also, God gives things to us to share. If we don't because we don't think anyone needs it, or that they have heard it all before... I'm not saying that everything you have been given needs to be publicly proclaimed. Motives. It always comes down to motives. If you announce everything that God has given you all the time, you better have a good reason, because I would probably like to punch you. Why do you say what you say? Somewhere, it is said that your words come from your heart. That is where evil or good comes from in a man. That is why you can give your body up unto the flames, and never once deny Jesus' name, but still not make it into heaven. It ain't nothing without love. Why do we do what we do?

Trust is a dangerous, difficult thing. Why dangerous? I'm talking about trusting in God. If he said something, he is going to do that. Do I trust that? The danger comes in when I decided God said he would do something he didn't. What am I then? I'm a fool, and I don't want to be a fool, so I can't pretend God said something he didn't. One of my realized goals in life is to not be stupid. Tricking myself into thinking my word is God's is stupid. But there are things that God defs said to do. It is in that book that he wrote. Loving enemies and neighbours and sharing what you are given. What if God lets you down? It sort of sounds silly to read, why would a God who loves you let you down? What if I wait for him to and he doesn't, what if I fall on my face because I trusted in him? They told me I was being silly. God loves me, and he will be there, and it would be silly to say he weren't. It's scary. What is my point? I don't know. I stayed up too late.

Trust God with your life, even though it is scary, and do things for the right reasons. Is putting stuff like this on the internet silly? Oh well.

3 comments:

MC said...

is doing anything really worthwhile unless it puts ourselves on the line at some point? Not ignorantly but with trust?

Matthew said...

I assume you're back in Sidney. We should hang out.

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